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The Riley Guide: Resumes & Cover Letters

Something to Lighten Up Your Search:
A Different Kind of Rejection Letter

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A friend who was out of work for quite a while sent this to me and suggested that I post it for all of you. He said that during his search it made him laugh and he hoped that it would have the same reaction. I have no idea where it came from, so apologies on not recognizing the originator. Just in case it is real, I've changed the names and organizations in order to protect the possibly innocent. --mfd

March 14, 1996

Professor Hombre
Chair - Search Committee
Department of Biochemistry
University of Towanda Health Sciences Center
Towanda, IA

Dear Professor Hombre,

Thank you for your letter of March 6. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me an assistant professor position in your department.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite the University of Towanda's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor in your department this May. I look forward to seeing you then.

Best luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,

Goddard Youville


If you could use some more chuckles to keep you going, check out the Job Search humor at The Humor Bin.

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